Waiting in Vain

I know we are suppose to be writing on feminism or simply close reading. But I simply do not feel like it. Why?  No reason, I simply do not want to.

Just some hours ago my friend was a bit down because he felt that life was changing. When he described his feeling I pictured, "the figure of a man standing beside a desolate rock on the seashore" (55). A bit emo, I know, but it was an illustrative manner to portray my relation to his feeling.

We feel alone, desolate and misunderstood when we are facing change, when we feel that our friends are not there for us, that fade away in the distance once we receive our high school diploma. But that is life.

Why when we feel like that we "wait for the material pictures which we think would gather"(56)?
Pictures of solitude, and despairing feelings.

It is because we expect change to be painful. And it is. It hurts. Life is ephemeral, a cycle of never ending changes that transforms us and others as we go along. And simply because, it is painful to leave those moments of pleasure, of enjoyment, what makes us reach that so called happiness. As if picturing pain would surpass that feeling of loosing something or even someone, making us feel victims of our own conscious feeling.

We feel deceived by life itself when our greatest moments become memories, and wait for them to come again. But, "we wait in vain"(56).

There are, "no pictures of solitude, of hope, of longing, or despair. But the very passions themselves" (56). The passion of enjoying what we have, without picturing it as a future pain because we lost it.

The passion of embracing what we know will not last long.